How Society affects teenagers today #26

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How society affects teenagers today #26 by Balraj Purewal

Tagline: "These are the broken pieces of the puzzle that you still end up piecing together.."

Life has moved on so quickly and within the space of a generation our world is now seen through a phone, almost 24/7. In fact I can't recall the last time I went out myself and didn't snap, Instagram or Facebook a status update. But for teenagers today in our society things are different.

The youth of today they experience larger problems and issues, such as seeking external validation, comparison amongst peers and so often finding themselves missing the beauty of the presence.

It is with this I decided to interview a teenager to show us, and give us a first insight into the life of a teen today. He explains very eloquently the struggles, the good the bad and the types of challenges he is presented with daily, amongst other teens.

He is a poet at a heart, currently studying at my favourite university (no bias), whilst trying to figure out where he fits in the world amongst figuring out the intent of other people.

We speak about many things in this episode that I really enjoyed recording such as:

  1. Intent
  2. Importance of internal validation
  3. Being true to yourself
  4. Finding your voice
  5. Working hard
  6. Using social media for what it is today

A guy who is wise beyond his years and someone I believe will go on and achieve his dreams in the world today, I urge you all to show him some support and follow his journey below. I also thank him for sharing the truth ad being transparent about how society affects teenagers today:

P.s. remember any new reviews on iTunes, just send me a screenshot either on twitter, instagram or to my email and ill send you the diet and gym plan as promised. It will likely be a 7-day window due to the volume of listeners.

Support the podcast: https://www.patreon.com/rss/findyourvoice?auth=gBnWmJ5cdB_Q3FsUedWmWawIe7tjfbhS

Links to me:

Website: https://www.arendeu.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aren.deu/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/arendeu

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/aren.singh

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/aren-deu-65443a4b/

Podcast: https://findyourvoicepodcast.com

YouTube: http://tiny.cc/51lx6y

 

Links to guest:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/_b.purewal/ (Personal)

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/word___art/ (Poetry)

Snapchat: B.purewal

Have an awesome day & #JustDeuIt #FindYourVoice

YouTube Transcription:

[Music]

welcome to an episode of find your voice

a movement led by yours truly

Aren do a guy who has overcome

crippling anxiety adversity and

difficulty like so many of you in life

whose main goal now is to help you

combat your excuses take control of your

life write your own story and most

importantly find your voice so now

without further ado I welcome the host

of the show himself mr. Aren do what's

going on people thank you for tuning in

to another episode of find your voice my

name is Aren and as always I am the

host of this show so today I'm gonna be

bringing you our youngest ever guest on

the show now I was a little bit

skeptical if I'm completely honest of

having somebody so young coming out to a

show like find your voice because find

your voice generally speaking it's

people who have gone through adversity

gone through obstacles and problems and

then all of a sudden I sat back and I

thought hold on a second this is the

exact kind of person we need on this

show because I'm sitting here and almost

making this judgment which is again

showing something that I need to be

aware of and learn from that people

going through their teenagers and going

into transition into adulthood

haven't got a voice and that's not what

I wanted the show to be about so anyway

I'm gonna be completely honest he over

delivered in fact he was the star of

this show and I'm very grateful that he

shared his experience because there's so

many things he mentioned in this episode

that made me kind of think back to how

easy I suppose my life was growing

through that transition and many of us

listening to this because I checked the

demographics are a lot older than

barrages and we never had to go through

the social media constraints and the

problems and that external validation

that these children and teenagers are

going through today so it's a very very

good episode in terms of one for anyone

who's going through this transition are

you the teenagers who are hopefully

trying to get to listen to this show to

inspire and motivate

but more importantly it's just as

important for us slightly older people

who maybe forgot what it was like grow

no to hear somebody's perspective or how

different life is so we talked a lot

about intent we talked about the types

of people that you come across in life

but we also talk about some stuff that

just really blew my mind that I was

talking to a teenager especially when I

think back to what I was like growing up

because I was not this emotionally away

that I was just figuring it out and it

gained that last bit there figuring it

out is something that we go on to talk

about quite a bit in this episode

because irrespective of where you are in

this journey in this wonderful thing

called life we're always just trying to

figure it out so hopefully you find this

useful especially towards the end of the

show because his last two answers were

incredible and they were very poetic and

then I happen to realize that he has a

poetry account on Instagram which kind

of made sense so a kid with a huge

future ahead of him I'm very grateful

that I've managed to tap into the

younger demographics as well I'm very

grateful for Barrett this time and I

hope you all really enjoy this episode

so without further ado let's jump into

it okay people I just like to start this

show by welcoming bowrage to the show

and thanking all the listeners for

tuning in today how you doing today my

friend yeah I'm not too bad not too bad

Oh better runs well thanks I let me come

on the show oh you're very welcome my

friend so I think to start this show I

think it's really important that the

listeners get to know you a little bit

so if you would have mind if you can

just kind of give us a brief

introduction into the life of Berridge

please yeah well so obviously I went to

around four primary schools already

remember too much about it if I'm honest

I mean I'm the whole guys created for

one but then as I went along we moved

house quite a bit went to one school

that was pretty racist I was like what

like the third brown person there so it

was like I was getting called like the P

word most of the time and I was like

what the hell's going on so being quite

young in primary school didn't really

enjoy primary school too much because

always like an outsider don't know if it

was because I was moving so much or

maybe I just wasn't people's kind of

guided which is not a problem and then I

don't know what just literally got into

high school and then I was like well I

don't want that happening again it's not

something one happening teenage hormones

are last like kicking in you know that

was raging

different kind of world with high school

you thinking what's going on here I've

learned

really from lucky s7 I mean if if I'm

honest when I was in the s7 array I was

bit of know a kid or what Liars used to

end up in isolation call hi a lot I'm

not sure well I am sure why but I feel

like the school was quite strict as well

so any little minor thing I did would

basically be picked up on which is not a

bad thing I guess it took me to mature

much quicker and this just kind of

lasted to around year 10 I was like well

it ain't about who's got the biggest the

biggest this the biggest bat who can do

this who can do that because the reality

doesn't make any difference at all it's

just you can crack on with themselves

and look after themselves and then when

I got to about year 11

it just kind of semi just came out of my

shell bit more because you know kind of

a person that it loves to talk to people

I'm not sure why always been my thing

you know

even now this like being on the podcast

I read messaging you know I just love

talking to people

stead of me being stuck to my fault I'm

well I just beat somebody okay I can

intake this knowledge from you how can I

apply this to my life oh you can do it

like this so like Erin you may say to me

I'll do it this way and I may not even

sing this other perspective because I

maybe so maybe I don't know deleted with

my own which is better for me to realize

obviously social media you know the

phones are great but sometimes a lot of

people just end up stuck to it even

myself at times well of course yeah but

it was weird because in s7 like good on

words high school wise I always thought

to myself I am I'm not fitting in it

doesn't make any sense why can I not do

what they're doing why can I not do what

the older people I did not realize and I

should have enjoyed it more in the

moment so I was okay cool that's not a

problem and then as soon as I started to

come up my shell but yeah 11 time you

know starts being two more people it was

like a lot more people were coming to me

came to six form where it was pretty

much the biggest change definitely fully

came out my child say I'm you know not

in a cocky way oh I'd say I'm quite

talkative bubbly loving and caring

person mm-hmm so I guess it's kind of

came with some baggage as well because I

couldn't even realize with somebody that

was trying to maybe mess me around in

front of my face

I want to realize because I think they

have the same heart as me hmm so I

wouldn't even realize anything like that

and then obviously you know that you

live and learn obviously as you growing

up and I think for teenagers now it's

hard because everybody's trying to

sorry for the language but fuck each

other over unless they're really genuine

because they're like oh I have this or

my dad's got this my mom's got this what

does yours has what does your has yours

have I've got this PlayStation you don't

have it oh you don't have it why not or

you know just the little - things which

is you know it's no part of general

going on but I guess you don't realize

that until you actually do start to grow

up and like me going up into a man no

bit of an awkward age at the moment 19

kind of in the middle teenager turned

into a young actual man now if you know

me like 18 years the normal designated

age anyways for when they say you were a

young adult voice you're still in that

in between mm-hm if you know what I mean

and then yeah like obviously then I went

to uni as well so just finished my first

year basically thought I'd stay out

first year get a bit more independence

and you know again actual experience of

like the halls or whatever like you know

how everybody hyped up or whatever and

it was great experience met some amazing

people really amazing people some people

with some really good hearts but you

meet some give me some weird ones as

well it's really weird people you know

some people may just want to use and

abuse some people actually may want to

hang around with you or some people just

want to distract you so you've just got

to make sure that you stay true to

yourself and keep with a good heart at

all times

so it seems that until at least

University you were trying to one figure

out who you are but to also figure out

how people are and I suppose especially

with the last one it doesn't really

change I mean I'm a little bit older

than you but I still go through that

situation where I'm still trying to

figure out why people are the way they

are or why certain people don't act the

ways for instance that I act so I will

always go in with good intentions and

then all of a sudden you'll realise that

other people's intent isn't necessarily

the same as yourself so I suppose a

piece of advice having gone through that

probably a little bit more than yourself

is just try and at least be wary of

people's intent because some people

might come across as almost like the

greatest people that you've ever seen

but then you will find later on once

they get what they need to extract from

you as a person you'll find they'll kind

of disappear so that's just kind of like

a piece of advice but you touched on

some prevalent things that I can

definitely

think about when I was a kid so

especially in the Punjabi culture the

whole drinking and how much can you

drink it's a purely ego thing 100% I

fell into that I fell into almost

damaging my health at the fact of I need

to keep up with people when I drink

where is now I'd like to think of myself

as slightly more matured if I don't

fancy a drink I would just say that's

enough for me and I'll kind of walk away

from it but again it's a learning lesson

a few points I've just made not of as

well that I want to just touch on so you

were always a naughty kid and you're

always I mean you've got yourself

excluded for trying to bite somebody's

nose but then all of a sudden things

started to change and you said something

which I thought was quite important and

it was you opened up and the moment you

started to open up you felt people start

to gravitate towards you more I just

want this in relation to that then was

that a sort of force thing or was that

just you thinking okay there's no point

me just being this shy person when I

have so much more to show to the world

obviously I was looking at other people

thinking how are they doing this why so

many people coming to them I'm just you

know I'm worrying too much about other

people now you know I actually need to

listen unlike for me and I've always

been quite open anyways quite if I want

something or if I want a fun one and

know something or I want to say

something

I will say because I just get that off

my parents as well because if they want

to say something they'll just say they

don't they don't be around the bush I

don't see the point either because then

you're just passing around make it more

fuss than need to be so then literally I

just try to be myself and I was like

okay this about in the year 11 more in

six form was around a lot of people are

coming to me and I was like okay this is

a bit weird I don't really know how to

handle this and what I found was it just

came with a lot of baggage as well

because a lot of people were coming to

me but I was like even me me being a

dumb ass at times I want to realize that

some people are just there to use me for

popularity or whatever it was and it's

okay though because like I learned from

it like it made me learn that some

people like you you don't need to hang

around with these people all the time

you don't need to hang around with a

popular crowd it just doesn't make a

difference we should be working towards

better in the world absolutely I think

that's a valid point and just on that

basis you just reminded me of something

that you said earlier as well so you

said initially obviously you find it

difficult to fit in and then you said

which is

a problem like literally straight after

and I thought I was that was quite a

clever point that you made plus it also

shows your intelligence that you're

thinking a lot differently because at

that age it is all about fitting in it

is all about being the coolest kid on

the block getting the most likes on

Instagram and being that that kind of

person what I want to ask you is when

you start to be yourself and things were

more positive and obviously you know is

this and you've just explained it do you

know why you wasn't yourself prior to

that I just think are always quite since

since being young I've always been quite

observant a bit more like bit or not

always been an awful thinker I'm not

sure why I just I've always thought that

I need to be doing more than I need then

I am or I need to be doing pair but you

can't be because like that's that's

where I got to university now and I've

only just realized now that you can't be

perfect in everything you do and me

being like a lot of perfectionist when I

was in school you know I was about to

get the best grades etc you know GCSE

was okay you know six form I did quite

well and I just thought you could be

perfect but as a human you just can't be

perfect so then I started to realize

just be myself I'm always gonna have my

flaws as everybody else will have the

floors it just depends who wants to stay

with you and still accept your flaws and

accept you you want 100 percent I think

you just hit the nail on the head there

as humans you can't be perfect there is

no such thing as perfect and this is one

of the things that I suppose even when I

started this podcast it was to show

people look I'm just a shy person I'm an

anxious person even in this conversation

with yourself on making mistakes um for

getting my words and stuff as well and

sometimes it's about embracing your

vulnerabilities your weaknesses and then

next time just trying to be a little bit

better so I think that's a very good

lesson for anyone in your situation and

just I'm gonna finish it actually on

another thing that you mentioned as well

which was when you said in relation to

how people may not have the same intent

as you is that it's okay you learn from

it and it sounds easier in hindsight but

I think if we can all take our

experiences your life not not as a

personal attack but more as a sort of

learning experience I think it helps

your mental sanity a lot more so I've

had people for example where a similar

situation to yourself where I'm thinking

why hasn't that worked out or why is the

person acting in this way that you know

a normal person wouldn't think is

ethical

or the right way and rather than

dwelling on that and then thinking I'm

not worthy of receiving a good person in

my life what I do is I take that as a

lesson and I think okay fair enough that

person's got what they wanted out of

this relationship but next time I'll

have more experience and I'll be wiser

from it and if a similar type of person

comes along I will know to move on away

from that situation if that makes sense

yeah like even what I said like it's

like even whoever is it can only be a

lesson a blessing or like you know like

they're there for life whether it's a

friend or a family member

absolutely absolutely so we've touched

on University and how you've developed

in terms of one trying to find out

exactly who you are you feel a lot more

comfortable now in the way that you are

you've slid into my DMS you happily

speak into other people I think that's a

great way that we should be in the world

especially coming from a very shy person

I wish I had the confidence just to kind

of put my hand out or just smile at

people openly in the world because even

through my very short experience on this

podcast I've met some incredible people

and I realize that I'm at my happiest

when I'm connecting with people and when

I'm getting on with people so I think

it's fantastic that you're doing that at

such a young age what have you done

since University or what are you looking

to now achieve moving forward in life

moving forward obviously on your first

year Aston University doing business

management great unique kind of the

typical thing probably I'd be void yes I

want IT typical thing but all in all

from young always like I'm just always

wanting to be self-employed it's not

that like okay it's decent working for

people if they give you decent benefits

but what I find is that if you can

control your own destiny and you can

build what you want to build him it may

not be something that you know now like

even me I'm still like what do I do

do I go this way do I go that way it's

still not no but I guess there's still

time to figure it out it's not like life

is short but it's also long as well and

you know there is some days but you'll

be lazy and there's some days where you

just don't have a clue what you do but

it's like pretty much everybody's faking

it until they can make it basically in

their own ways which is not a bad thing

how can everybody know what's going on

really because then really trying to

figure themselves out figure where their

foundations are in the world for me I

want to build my sample the best I can

be

my parents have allowed me to have a lot

of freedom and it's right like even

people come up to me

whyyou moment that's all like cool with

you what like that my dad is my dad

he'll know when to tell me like straight

to the point

but he'll even have a conversation with

me like we're like best friends wish I

look and the same thing I can do with my

mama's also you know I'm glad that had

parents like that got two lovely sisters

as well you know they're growing up now

you don't even realize how much they're

growing up until you actually see them

you thinking that how did you get taller

it's all a crazy one even myself I look

in the mirror I think where did this

beard come from I always wanted to be at

this person's got a beard why can I have

one but they just comes in your own time

as everything does absolutely unlike for

myself you know I think for the Barrett

barrage I am today like I would say for

myself I'm a loving caring humble but

more selective person based on the

experience that I've already had because

life is already hard as it is life's

already the responsibility is gonna

start ended up piling up anyways so

there's no point it would be negative

you could have just got to try be as

positive as possible absolutely I think

that's really well said and this

actually helped me massively my mindset

and hopefully can help the listeners as

well is the moment I realize that every

single person is just figuring it out

and regardless of their external

appearance or how they seem to have it

all together and realize it actually

they don't and just like you just like

me just like the person listen to this

we're all just figuring it out

nobody's give us the perfect blueprint

for life I don't believe that one exists

yeah I think it's brilliant that you

know that on 19 because at 19 I was I

think I was starting you need do my

first qualification and I had no idea

what I was doing I didn't know what I

wanted to become the kind of person I

want you to be remembered for

I was not aligning anything with my

values on my ethics and this is

something that obviously you're now

going through that journey and everyone

around your age is gonna actually go

through but I think if you can all just

take one lesson away and just know that

you don't have to have it all figured

out in fact I'm now under a little bit

older where I'm still trying to figure

out what am I going to be doing in the

next five years in ten years and what

happens is as we start to grow as people

through our own personal development our

awareness

be more selective which I thought was a

brilliant thing that you pointed out as

well then you're automatically find

yourself moving towards things that you

love and

your passion projects hence my podcast

here so I said brilliant and today like

I said you're a lot wiser than I was at

your age hopefully thank you hopefully

you continue so I was going to ask you

about your routine but I'm pretty

certain I know how most uni students

live their life at uni so here's and

there's nothing wrong with that because

it's all it's all part and parcel of the

journey I mean my university meeting was

literally vodka kabobs hangover and

whatever whatever I could find on TV so

exactly so I'm not gonna embarrass you

about that but I want to move on to

something that might be able to give

somebody again some value from this

interview is about adversity so if you

can think of maybe like a time and I

know you're still young yet but I still

believe that we become the kind of

people we are because of the lessons of

the journeys that we go through so if

you could think of a lesson of adversity

or a problem that you face and then more

importantly once you've shared that if

you could just tell us what you learned

from it can i this question if I - okay

because I think what I found has given

me the biggest shock this year is

holding on to people okay you know

having expectations of people because it

told me a lot this year because you know

you know how it is lobbying a young lad

you think these are my boys man these

are doing it all I'm gonna do it as well

you know and it will work in the same

cycle and don't get me wrong it's all

good to have your friends your boys

whatever you want to call them but you

have to realize when your energy is not

being valued or serving you and somebody

if they're not going to value it because

a lot of people are just there to pretty

much just take the mick and they'd

already care what's going on your life

they just won't know because if you

aren't doing better than them thinking

why can't I do that myself as well that

you know again not in an arrogant way

are all like you know I'm friends with

girls I don't see them like any

different 2ml you know we're human at

the end of the day and a fun you know

sometimes you know it may sound bad to

say as well you know more for gender

equality and stuff but sometimes girls

are just a bit more sensible with their

thinking you're a fee

so whereas lads will just be like well

we'll be looking at each other what do

you want to do your should we have a

drink shall we do this mainly it just

depends on the crowd that you surround

yourself with so once you find that

right crowd that's when it will be all

good and well but it's just fine in that

right crowd and finding who you to stay

away from here to stay with you know I

seek quite a lot of validation from

others as well

well all in all I don't need to worry

about if it's good for myself and when I

look back at it now it was good it was

great every single time

and if I didn't look at other people all

the time then you know I would have

started to appreciate myself a lot

earlier but now I'm glad that I'm snow

young and still learning now learning

now that I only need to worry about if

it looks good for me and not anybody

else because you're the only one that

you have in this world you know you have

your family that you keep close friends

you you know friends are the family that

you choose and you know y'all needed to

care what you think of yourself as a

whole and a fair for you that you can

really trust and that's the bottom line

really for me absolutely Matt I think

that's a brilliant point that you just

made there and I think some of the stuff

that you're explaining now isn't stuff

that I believed that we had to go

through especially my generation or the

generations older than myself because

the whole getting validation from your

peers or getting validation from social

media it's become a massive massive

problem in society

and you also touched on a very good

point as well in relation to women being

more sensitive and more I suppose open

to talking about their feelings and this

is something that I really want to try

and work on in the future is getting men

to open up about their vulnerabilities

and talk about their weaknesses and all

things that they struggle with because

male suicide is far too high for what it

should be in fact it should never be

mental health is obviously poor as well

with males as well and I just think we

have such a bravado and this kind of we

have to show strength all the time that

we're almost too afraid to kind of speak

and it causes problems so I think it's

great that maybe it's you as an

individual hopefully it's more

widespread across your community that

you guys are at least acknowledging that

there is this lead here in your society

so I think that's brilliant I think it's

also important that anyone in your age

range or anyone going through what

you're going through doesn't seek

validation externally it's all about

receiving internal validation first

you've got to love yourself before

anyone else out they can love you

because irrespective of what they say

when it comes down to it you sit in your

own mind on a daily basis on your bottom

your mind can be your best friend or it

can actually be your enemy so you really

need to work on that so it's reassuring

for me listening to you to know that

you're in a much better place understand

I mean I think like even how you saying

they're sorry to cut you off is no no

you can with mental health and you know

that even as you said the suicide goal I

didn't

that myself that male suicide is going

up but with mental health like I find it

such a big cuz even myself like I won't

sit here and I say I haven't been for it

myself I have because I always think

like you know I've been there in my bed

feeling low as how old you know feeling

feeling rock but I'm thinking you know

and people will say to me what do you

have to stress about you're only 18 19

and that's okay that's so cool that's

there like we used to get on with it

back in the day but it's just it's not

the same because we've got all this

access to social media nowadays we've

got people trying to make themselves

look better put like different like you

know brightnesses on their pictures or

increase the brightness of their face on

their pictures and you know you may meet

some people they don't like this day and

then they're not actually like what

we've been trying to portray they are

and social media and that's what F's it

all up because you can't betray yourself

to be something on social media and when

you meet the person you like well this

person just the whole different spectrum

and with mental health advice it's

always like you can you can do better

than the other person who you can F over

the other person who can keep on going

until some like it's like a it's like a

rat race like a wolf kind of like a wolf

pack sort of thing who can be the the

wolf that climbs at the my own first and

and all the other ones are trying to

like basically just drag him down and

it's hard because you know even with

Punjabi community once again they're

always like well if you say to them that

you have a mental health problem well

they'll just be like okay no problem

just deal with it yeah I mean it can't

be that way because I'll getting worse

now and there's only more awareness

about it now because of social media

which the benefits of social media as

well and all this kind of stuff I think

that's a that's a great point and again

for the listeners that it's a lot harder

and I kind of do sympathise with you

guys coming up in this generation where

social media has this good parts but it

has this kind of evil tail to it as well

where I never had to deal with that so

growing up for me when I was going to

university and we were drinking and

partying his sir

we were never worried about taking snaps

or or having a whole night out looking

through the lens of our phone it was

just kind of being there in the moment

in experience in it and then our

self-worth wasn't pretty much like that

oh absolutely and at the same time our

self-worth wasn't predicated on the fact

of when we go home at the end of that

night who got the most likes on that for

the most engagement for example so I'm

very grateful for that and I think it's

important that you mentioned that but I

just want to say something else that you

mentioned as well because you've said it

a few times now and it's probably more

so because of your

is that you seen everyone F each other

over because of like you're almost

seeing it like a rat race and I think

the rat race thing is an important thing

and I've tweeted something this morning

it was taken from Wayne died and it's a

very good quote which i think is quite

useful for where we are right now in

this show and what he says is we're in

partnership with all other human beings

it's not a contest to be judged better

than some and worse than others and I

think if we all sin ourselves a sort of

partnering up with humans and trying to

help each other move forward in this

life because at the end of the day we're

all figuring it out as we've touched on

earlier I think the world will be in

such a better place but we have this

scarcity mindset where we think in order

for me to move forward I have to stand

on somebody else or put somebody else

aside as opposed to saying yeah why do I

hold your hand and we'll move together

and you're always quicker and stronger

together so I think it's reassuring to

hear that you're you've got that mindset

and I think if you remain selective like

you mentioned earlier I think you'll get

the right network around you to

obviously help yourself move forward I

think what it is as I it's always that

you've got you right it's always at all

and everything as well it's like that's

if you want to create a business right

it's always a trial and everything where

humans are like you may trust one and

then they may break your trust and you

merge that listen with your whole heart

and that's not bad that's not that

shouldn't people shouldn't beat

themselves up if that happens because

it's a learning lesson that means that

person wasn't meant to be in your life

and that means that there's better to

come because even even anyways that

you've got to have some good days to

have some bad days you've got to have

some bad days to have some good days

it's just as simple as that and you just

gotta take the positives that are very

from that you can't absolutely me

absolutely yes sir very wise words for a

19 year old so appreciate I'll get at me

so you're now in your first year

University you've made massive strides

with your talent and your emotional

intelligence is really really high which

is nice to hear what saves you very good

question

currently in my life at the moment what

scares me is not being able to provide a

comfortable life for our potential

future wife and kids you know not be

enough hub I'm a family now my mom dad

my sisters you know they're gonna want

to get married and well yeah I think

they're gonna need help with fine like

finance is not the be end and end all

but it does make life with more freedom

more comfort so you know if there's

something that I

dude help them make their life easier

and maybe I don't know let's say I had

another source of income I could give it

to them I'd be happy to do that but it's

just you've got a we're card for these

things my mom you know she's a teacher

herself so you know I always see yes

she's always stressed out so she's

always coming you know she'll be with

work all day she'll be coming back in

the market papers you know tour about

9:00 10:00 at night I don't know she

does it and then repeat the day my

biggest fear is not making their life

easier and my biggest fear is not being

able to provide a comfortable life for

myself and the family around me

I think you've almost answered the next

question as well which I was going to

ask about the motivation so it seems

that your motivation right now is to be

able to successfully graduate and then

provide different streams of income to

facilitate one obviously your sister's

getting married helping your parents at

home and then obviously giving yourself

the kind of life that you want as well

yeah because like even for me as well

and working under people just kind of

get under my skin a bit to be honest but

you're gonna have to do the minute you

agree for a couple years of your life

because that's the way it is when you're

young as well you know people have told

me that that's the way and you just

gotta work hard you've got to keep your

chin up which is not a problem

so like currently now I'm working at

Nando's which is not a problem I'm happy

I'm happy for the free Nando's I can't

complain but it's a good job for me now

but could I see myself doing that when

I'm what thirty years old I wouldn't

like to think so often - because you

know even though it's a good job you

know dealing with customers that

straight rude or having so much pressure

put on you and you know running back and

forth running back and forth it's all

good while I'm young but maybe when I

get older maybe I may not just have that

energy that's interesting firstly I'm

hoping I get a free round after this

podcast session is on oh yeah that's

just as good the weird thing is the

reason I'm touching on does is one

everyone knows I absolutely love Danlos

but tea when I was at university it just

opened on Birmingham Broad Street and I

remember sitting there oh I worked

literally all the way through University

so I went to the same uni as you

Aston uni and I always had a job no

Wayans yeah yes I had a job on the

weekends and my aim I remember when

Nando's opened after trying it I was

like man I really wish I had a job at

Nano so it's funny how the world works

but there was a point in time where

having a job at Nando's was literally my

dream job at least for that period in

one yeah time so appreciate where you

are

appreciate or the good thing

be grateful for everything that's coming

your way now it's taught me like you

know it's told me that hard to grit my

teeth who went there a lot of rude

customers come in so you have to look

after it like it's like it sounds a bit

weird like it's like your own family you

have to keep it clean the place because

that's where people are going to come in

like you know if you come into the story

you want to make sure everything is

clean you want to make sure the food's

on point cannot attend not 9 out of 10

because it's not if it's not 10 out of

10 then you know you're not going to be

happy with the service at all you know

have a smile on your face and just keep

on going like keep your chin up even

when it gets hard like even for me

sometimes I'll be like I'm just touching

my forehead thinking flirty arm and I

need a break but you just got to keep on

going absolutely me absolutely we're

actually at the fun part the show now

there is no right or wrong answer but

just try and say the first thing that

comes in your head we're gonna go in

three two one

if you could abolish one thing in the

world what would it be judgmental people

peanut butter and Nutella peanut butter

your biggest role model biggest role

more mom what would you like to be

remembered for being Who I am your

biggest goal this year to just keep on

working hard no matter how hard it gets

your worst mistake is listening to other

people about a certain person if you

could relive one day again what day

would it be 26 of May two years ago why

it was just everybody was there

family friends you know we was at my

house and it was just you just wanted

most be of things you know honestly I

read I really loved that day I loved it

the ability to fly or be invisible

invisible when your fame that's a hard

on max I'm thinking well with things you

can get money but then what I say money

your favorite food the mix grown and

okay speak our languages will be able to

speak to animals animals what song best

describes your life Dizzee Rascal

bonkers would you rather know how you

would die or when you would die and

finally if you could sit with one person

in the world for an hour who would it be

probably my baby my grandma I love that

so the next question it's about

reflection and I'm a firm believer that

hindsight is a wonderful thing and it

teaches us ways to get there quicker

easier and we're less heartache

but I'm also an avid believer that the

journey teaches us so much as well in

terms of his lessons so what I want to

know is if you could go back in time to

one particular moment knowing everything

that you know right now and whisper

something to a younger barrage what

would you say I just said to myself I'd

say barrage do you not worry it will all

come to you in the end you will not end

up failing you are not a quitter

you are not inclined to please other

people put yourself first say no if you

don't want to do it it's as simple as

that

enjoy the present moment more don't look

too much into the future ruining your

full process already and don't look back

with pain in your heart these are the

broken pieces of the puzzle which you

saw might end up still piecing together

have fun and live life enjoy your youth

don't look too much into girls

alcohol or any other distractions just

try and discipline yourself more keep

yourself closed off but keep yourself

living and humble always may I love that

I want you to do me a favor after this

podcast and actually send me that

written form and that was almost like

poetic you mentioned something there

these are the broken pieces and the

puzzle that's still in the piecing

together but I want to do it just this

so if you can send me that at your

transcript or what I'll do is I'm

actually gonna bring them out separately

no problem I mean I even I even do have

a separate poetry account as well that I

do must like check it out if you have

any time yeah it's on my new profile but

it's on its good word under school and

school oh okay check that as well

brilliant so suddenly that actually

brings us to the last question and the

last question that I always ask my guess

is if in a 150 years time science fails

to save us and all that exists is a book

and this book is about you and

everything that you've achieved in your

life all your weird and wonderful dreams

have been accomplished what I want to

know is firstly what would the title of

the book say and secondly what would the

blurb at the back tell us about you I

wrote yesterday I said you know he was

like I know other he persevered like no

other he had himself he was elegant

clean hearted charming and crazy he

would always go the extra mile for those

who were close to his heart at times end

up here

all in all he always tried to see the

bright side of life the world is already

too cold and entangled in its own

pleasures to not be positive

of that as powerful have you got a title

for that the title the life of an

inquisitive man brilliant me if you

wouldn't mind could you give us the best

sources via social media where we can

contact you Instagram I love being on

instagram my instagram is under school

beat up for a while its be PU or e w al

quite active on snapchat as well is beat

up for a while again be pu r e w al

they're the main ones I'm active on to

be honest ok no problem so what I'll do

is for everyone listening today I'm

gonna make sure I put all of the links

so you can contact barrage directly very

social media as you've probably seen

from some of these answers today's very

poetic so I'll be following them on his

Instagram poetry handle as well myself

straight after this

I want to thank Mirage for being open

about his story and sharing it and

hopefully this influences and inspires

many others and I want to thank everyone

at home for listening thank you thank

you and remember this podcast is

absolutely free so all we ask in return

is for you to share this with a friend

and drop us a five star review over on

iTunes have an awesome day


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